Thursday, September 22, 2011

ANTM 17 Ep 2

It's the all star season of ANTM. Never mind most girls are not the right age to model. Tyra's making them superstars. Before I get into episode two and the makeovers can we talk about this-



What the hell? Who allowed this to happen? Did Tyra learn photoshop? It is ridiculous and we have to see it at the end of every episode. I love Laura but I want her to leave just so I don't have to see her in that pool anymore. Like Alexandria doesn't have enough problems this season, now she has to deal with being photoshopped on a motorcycle. Not to mention Lisa is about to land crotch first into the ground with that jump split. I was hoping they would change it after makeovers but THEY DIDNT! Tyra is in the middle too (photoshopped to be super skinny). Is Tyra going to get rid of everyone and claim herself as the top all star?

I could go on and on about how irritating this competition is and how many other girls should have been brought back but I am going to move past all that. Let's just skip to the makeovers. Besides getting hair cuts the girls were also marginalized into a very small box by giving a brand word to live and die by. The girls pretend to be impressed by Martin Lindstrom who tells them all what they should do and say.

Alexandria - Alexandria is given the word "tough" which is pretty much the best she could hope for. They cut her hair short and she freaks out and cries. The girls call her fake, but I think is genuine. I feel like Alexandria is misunderstood. I think she's just a big weirdo. I'm cheering for her this season. Don't make me regret that Alexandria!

Allison - Allison is "unique". No duh Lindstrom! This guy rubs me the wrong way. I don't even know what they did for Allison's makeover. I think they might have just somehow made her eyes even bigger.

Angela - Did you know Angela secretly runs marathons so she was given the word "persistence"? Her make over is pretty fab. Her hair is just darkened and softened. Jay can't get over how elegant she is. Jay also has had silver hair so he might not be up on what elegant is.

Bianca - Bianca got "candid" because "loud mouth" is two words. She immediately started talking shit. I think she may have gotten extensions and then excused them of talking smack about her. Very candid.

Bre - I most confused by Bre's word. She got "Girlfriend". Do they mean like a friend to a girl or a boy's girlfriend? Either way what does that mean? They keep her hair the same length but cut the sides short. Bre is having vision trouble and thinks her head is shaved. She almost quit. Come on all stars, you know better than to doubt a makeover

Camille - "Proud" is the nicest way to put Camille's love of her own walk. Her makeover is pretty boring, she looks the same. Why does she keep pushing her booty out in the picture? It's making me uncomfortable.



Dominique - I understand why they gave Dominque "survivor" but how is she suppose to portray it in pictures? She does get the best makeover. She gets very full Farrah Fawcet hair. I want it.

Isis - Isis gets "role model" which is two words, but ya know. Her makeover is once again extensions that make her look exactly the same. Boring.

Kayla - Poor Kayla. Lindstrom tells her LBTGA is over and so five years ago. You know what else is probably five years ago?Lindstrom. You know what's 15 years ago? Tyra. He gives her the word free and she is rightfully confused. At least they give her back her red hair.

Laura - Laura gets lovable and she is (except when she is photoshopped in a baby pool). They cut her cut her hair and she looks good. Finally someone gets made over.

Lisa - Lisa is "daring" to the point you want to punch her. She's not daring enough to cut her hair though and cries a lot. She eventually accepts her haircut and wears American flag pants.





Shannon - The rest of the girls want her to get the word "boring" but she gets "trustworthy". Her makeover is also unremarkable. I hope she sticks around awhile just so she can keep pissing everyone off.

Sheena - Oh, Sheena! You could tell the producers had no idea what to give her. Why is she back? I didn't hate Sheena on her original season but she just seems pointless now. Maybe it's because she is not a ridiculous human being in context of this season. They tell her they are going to cut her hair but it was just a ruse. She looks exactly the same after her makeover. It's not a big surprise when she leaves. Sorry Sheena. At least you don't have to be apart of the ridiculous photoshop anymore.


Fingers crossed they bring Janice back at some point.

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